a series of unfortunate events

19 Mar

{Alternate title: why cooking just isn’t fun for me}

I’ve been pretty MIA as a blogger around here lately. My better half has been doing a lot of the cooking while I entertain the child and lie on the couch. It’s been grand. However, today’s the husband’s birthday, and so I decided that small child and I would do a little baking. At first I had this grandiose idea of doing everything from scratch!! But then I found this recipe- a modified box cake mix recipe– and decided that was more up my alley. Next the 2 year old and I had an argument about whether or not we were doing CUPCAKES or a CAKE. I really wanted a layer cake; he really wanted the cupcakes. Finally talked him into the cake by telling him how exciting it was that we’d get to put the cake on a super-fancy-special cake plate.

Next we hauled out the ingredients, the mixer, the bowl. Mixed everything together and the batter was a really thick, weird, goopy consistency. That’s when I realized I had forgotten to add the Sprite (or 7Up in my case), so in that went. Two layers of cake in the oven, and off we go to entertain ourselves for 30 minutes. At the end of the 30 minutes, small child is tantruming because his favorite You Tube video isn’t working. Then he’s tantruming that I ignore him to remove the cakes from the oven. For those of you that don’t have kids- tantrums are distracting. You do your best to ignore them and move on, but they really do get your blood pressure a boiling. So here I am, with a tantruming kid getting way too close to the oven at the same moment that I’m reaching into the oven (wearing a brand new oven mitt, mind you), and I did not have the foresight to use TWO hands to remove the cakes from the oven, and so I am unable to get a good grip with just one hand and then SPLAT! One of the cakes has overturned atop the inside of the oven door and all over the new oven mitt and I’m pretty sure I swore and then all I hear is screaming. DADA’S CAKE!!! DADA’S CAKE!!! WHAT HAPPENED WHAT HAPPENED TO DADA’S CAKE??? CAN YOU FIX IT DADA’S CAKE!!!!! WHAT WILL DADA SAY!!! I’m trying to be all calm and cool about this but really I’m pissed off and now I have smeared cake baking onto the inside of my oven door and things are just outta control all around. I took the brand new oven mitt and scraped as much gooped up cake off the door as I could. The dog came in and ate the rest off the floor, and then Ry and I dove into what was salvaged and had a little snack.

I then had to figure out this dilemma: do I stick with a ONE layer cake for good old daddy’s birthday, or do I make something else?? I went with the make something else option- or rather, make the same dang thing all over again- because Ry was REALLY in a tizzy over this destroyed cake. We had one planned errand to run this morning, which placed us conveniently in front of a Rainbow Foods. So not only did I destroy a cake, but I was then forced to shop at ghetto Rainbow to get the ingredients for cake #2.

This afternoon I’m planning on whipping up this dark chocolate cream cheese buttercream frosting (scroll way down to the bottom. and on your way check out that 14-layer wonder!). If I can accomplish the frosting task without some sort of disaster, it will be a miracle. I SO should have just picked up a back-up can of frosting while at Rainbow…


2 Responses to “a series of unfortunate events”

  1. Jen H March 19, 2010 at 7:03 pm #

    Oh no! I’m trying not to laugh, but the picture you’ve created is pretty funny. I hope cake #2 turned out fab. At least you got a snack out if it!


  1. March 22 Morning Roundup « The Heavy Table – Minneapolis-St. Paul and Upper Midwest Food Magazine and Blog - March 22, 2010

    […] reports on Chef Joan Ida’s sojourn in the land of the Highland Grill, the challenge of cooking with a fussy child, tickets for Outstanding in the Field are intriguing and also $180, City Pages checks out the Green […]

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